Who Said It Was Gonna Be Easy!!

So I did what I never thought I’d do today, I took the plunge and got a student loan. Guess I was doin pretty good if it took me to my last full semester do get one though. I’ll just look at it that way!

Cause I’ve always told my self… I will never get a loan. Guess I was dwelling about it too much thinking of it as a curse I’m putting on myself. But… I’m pretty sure my hair was falling out thinking how the heck am I gonna pay for school.

Instead of worrying about two things I summed it up into one and now I just have one. It feels like a weight has been lifted off me cause this semester is gonna be a costly one and a big one at that. I’ve asked for enough money to cover my living expensive and some other expenses I’ll be needing for school. Relieving myself from all these will let me focus on school. “So is that a PLUS?”

I’ve recently made kind of a big decision especially for myself, something I was kinda looking forward to but its best for me as in a relationship standpoint. If I were to want to work on a hotshot crew or attempt to work on one, I would have to be applying for one now.

Alright filling you in a little about one. They work out of state, of course but they work three to four months out of the year and are gone the whole entire time. SEE how this would put a dent in a relationship again especially if I were wanting to settle down.

So making my decision to settle down I’m taking the responsibility of staying in one spot. Standing still with no regrets. This summer I will be on a small crew that our school puts together to travel and fight wildland fires. Its small but I think it will feed my need for adventure in wild fires, they can be gone for two to three weeks at times. That’s manageable! Right? I think so!

School’s about to start up again! Yay! Can’t wait to get it started and work toward getting onto a department. I could tell you I wasn’t nervous but that wouldn’t be me not to be. Having already been introduced to the program somehow I am still nervous. Think it’s just the new class jitters. There will be a lot of hands on classes (meaning lifting). I have made a promise to my self to stop saying “I think” and say” I can”. Those two word will be helping me out a lot this semester.

Beginnings!

Now this whole thing started one day my sister suggested to me “You should try to be a firefighter” cause of my need to stay active. So I said heck yea! Had know idea what I was getting into, never knew of anyone close to me that was a firefighter to ask questions. In stead I just enrolled and was to start in a month. Yikes!

You can imagine all the nerves I had. I started to think… Would I be able to lift the things they did or move as fast as the boys? Than again my lovely sister told me “You’ll just have to figure out different ways of lifting things”. These words will forever echo in my head! No joke!  

Coming to the school I had no idea what to expect. Not gonna lie, I was VERY nervous. I think I was expecting maybe like the T.V. shows or movies where the boys would be extremely disagreeing to the fact females were there in there territory. At first the young freshmen boys weren’t sure to talk to me or just to stay the heck away and far away. But some how I met some really nice respectful guys, they eventually came around after seeing the guys who have been there a longer. 

Ok now for What the New Year brought to me, was… a dark haired, handsome (sexy)”PLUS”, older man ”PLUS”, and he’s from my hometown “BONUS”.  Such a sweet guy and a very big gentleman, actually very surprised he wasn’t already taken because you know them older guys are either married or have two kids Yikes!

To tell ya the truth I had no intentions on going back to my hometown, I was ready to travel the world on a hotshot crew following the fire. HA! Never even got out of the state. Big dreams for a small town girl. Huh? But one day last semester I realized I did want to settle down. I’ll be 25 when I finish school. Doesn’t give me much time to establish myself in a department AND in a relationship to the point of kids. Cause I do want kids even as much as I swear them off. And I do want to be married as much as I’ve run away.

But this guy has brought a change in me that I didn’t even see coming. Seriously! I’m all the sudden thinking of kids and getting married and how I can finish school from my hometown. And frankly to tell ya the truth I think I pretty much have it figured out.

Sooo… We’ll see this year if everything pans out. Cause everybody knows how plans work especially for “I” They can change faster than Kansas Weather.